So today ...
Hi All,
So today I'm walking to the gym and there's this guy, in a jacked-up pickup truck, who's driven up onto the grass nearby a Petro Canada to use the payphone. I mean, he drove his truck up the curb, over the grass, so he can insert a quarter and dial the phone FROM THE SEAT OF HIS TRUCK. He apparently didn't have the energy to, you know, get out of his truck and walk the ten yards to the phone. He'd torn tire-marks all over the grass. I didn't overhear much of his conversation, but I imagine it went something like this:
TRUCK GUY: Guess where I'm calling you from? My truck! No, not a cellphone: I drove my wicked-ass truck over the grass so I could call you from a pay phone! I'm totally cool, right? What do you mean I'm a massive tool? Awww, go suck an egg, ma!
He and I stared at each other as I walked by and he gave me the standard 'what the hell you looking at?' gesture: basically, making eye contact with an aggressive shoulder-lift. I contemplated asking him if he planned on driving through the plate-glass window of the Petro Can to buy a pack of gum, but I felt I've been beaten up enough in my life and it seemed such a worthless thing to fight over. Then again, if he was so lazy and dispirited he couldn't even get out of his truck to place a call, maybe I could've just gone and found an stick and poked at him from a safe distance.
TRUCK GUY: Oh, you son-of-a-bitch! Ow! Stop poking me! If I weren't a total lazy ass I'd get out of my truck right this minute and settle your hash! Settle it good and proper, I would!
All best, Craig.
Craig Davidson on 08.11.08 @ 07:36 PM EST [link]